Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Diapers and Grocery Bags? How About Greening Your Girly-bits?

More green, reusable products hit the market every day, and that is certainly a promising trend. It is especially noticeable here in California, where even the snotty "soccer moms" in their gas guzzlers are piling their teams' Gatorade and chips into canvas totes. Biodegradable dish soaps and laundry detergent are becoming more widely available as demand for them increases. The most hardcore of the green movement are buying biodegradable, chlorine-free diapers. Some are even purchasing cloth diapers. (I must note, however, that while cloth diapers are more cost efficient and seem green on the surface, the soap and water used laundering them makes virtually no less of an environmental impact than disposables.)

Almost every food item is now being offered in an organic version. We buy toilet paper and bank checks made from recycled paper. The world of casual disposal is coming to an end. One product, however, seems immune to criticism: feminine hygiene products. Whether this is out of fear of the wrath of bleeding, grumpy women or from sheer squeamishness, very few people seem willing to take aim at this wasteful product and its vast contribution to gorging landfills.

I believe the environmental impact of feminine hygiene products may also be ignored because it is generally off the radar. Many people purchase reusable grocery bags and the like because other people can see them. Nobody knows what is going on under your skirt, so there is little societal pressure to make greener choices. Several products are available that will greatly reduce, if not virtually eradicate, the environmental impact of menstruation. Until I began researching this topic, I had never even heard of some of them.

The typical feminine hygiene products are pads or tampons. Pads are, obviously, much larger and use more materials. Both products come in cardboard boxes. Each individual item inside the box is wrapped in a plastic liner. The tampons usually come with an "applicator." When all is said and done, there is a ton of unnecessary packaging that must be discarded in addition to the product itself. This, in and of itself, could be easily reduced. As a matter of fact, some companies seem to use the excess packaging as a selling point, offering it in various colors and making the applicators more elaborate. In the past, I have been a fan of the O.B. brand, which uses minimal packaging and is applicator free. Out of all the obvious choices, it is the one with the least environmental impact.

My research uncovered a myriad of other choices, some of which appear cleaner than tampons, not linked to T.S.S., and almost completely without waste. The Diva Cup is reusable for up to a year. There are also washable sponge tampons, chlorine free biodegradable pads and tampons, and the usual washable cloth pads from days of yore. Of all these products, the reusable cup seems to be the most sensible and sanitary, and some of the silicon versions claim to last as long as ten years.

I would love to see someone high profile actually have the balls to start pushing these greener products. If I were the first lady, I would be all over this, if for no other reason than to make Republican legislators squirm.

Friday, July 2, 2010

Guess Who's Back!

Old Sugar Tits is back friends! You honestly have no idea how great this makes me feel. I feed off of Mel Gibson's insanity like a Sith feeds off of anger.


This time Mel takes a break from blaming the Jews or offending the indigenous peoples of Mesoamerica to take care of a little home cooking. It seems he may have fathered a child with his ex, Oksana Grigorieva and he's none too pleased. He also doesn't care for her manner of dress. Here are the highlights from the HuffPo story:


"You're an embarrassment to me. You look like a f***ing pig in heat, and if you get raped by a pack of n***ers, it will be your fault."

"How dare you act like such a bitch when I have been so f**king nice."

"I am going to come and burn the f**king house down... but you will blow me first."

And to close it all out, this parting shot...

"This is my last message. I might be the father... Well, f** you... You psycho c**t... Because I don't care. Do you understand me? I'm done."

Oh man, I hope you're never done Mel. How do the Jews tie into this? I have to know! Review of Edge of Darkness to follow shortly...

Thursday, July 1, 2010

Eclipse: A Tale of Sappy Outdoor Conversations

I was torn in two over paying to see the third installment in the movie version of this abortion of a book series. On the one hand, I did not want to be another 30-something woman pumping money into this ridiculous franchise on opening night. On the other hand, I was full of curiosity, a desire to write a review, a love of being ironic, and a need to seek revenge on my four-year-old for making me endure both Toy Story 3 and Shrek 3 in the same month. I was bored, the matinee was cheap, and the latter decision won out. With preschooler in hand, I joined the throng of women queuing up for Twilight 3: The Return of Jacob's Pecs.

Not only did my son almost die of boredom during this movie, he also managed to get a Buzz Lightyear spinning candy dispenser caught in his hair. We are now even.

The movie started off with a relatively suspenseful scene of some poor schmuck being turned into a vampire minion by our main antagonist, Victoria, then ended with an epic battle between the Forks Supernatural Protagonist Society and the evil army of vampires Victoria and her minion form. Everything that happened between those two scenes was either mind-numbingly dull or embarrassingly painful.

First of all, Bella is still torn between Jacob and Edward. Does she want the whiny douche-bag with the golden eyes, tons of money, and the ability to offer her immortality? Does she want the pushy but hot Native American boy who needs anger management and might accidentally rip her face off if she burns the casserole? Decisions, decisions...

The dialogue, as before, is very wooden and phony. Think Anakin Skywalker in Attack of the Clones. Everyone is madly in love with everyone else, and they all talk about it outside for the hour and forty-five minutes they had to fill between battle scenes. Bella and Edward talk about their feelings in a field full of flowers. Then she and Jacob talk about their feelings at a lake in the mountains. Then they talk about it some more on a snow-dappled cliff in the mountains. Then she and Edward talk about some more random shit in a field again. It was like the worst dialogue scene from Attack of the Clones had glitter added to it and increased in length tenfold.

To add insult to injury, I still have to admit this movie was much better than both of its predecessors.

I think the best summary was what my son said about a half hour from the conclusion of the film: "Can we go home now? All these people do is talk and kiss and be stupid." Amen.

Wednesday, June 30, 2010

A Confusing Photo of Bill Clinton and Mick Jagger

Something appears to be afoot in this photo and our former President is none the wiser. Mick seems positively terrified though. Was it the chupacabra, the goat sucker of Mexican legend? Unlikely. The chupacabra was sympathetic to the DeKlerk government that fell in 1994. He is no longer welcome in South Africa.

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!

At long last, my man-crush on Landon Donovan is vindicated.

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