Thanksgiving is a Sham.

Personally, I find the idea of celebrating our "abundance" in this country to be grotesque beyond words. How many people are starving in the world, nibbling at insects and sticks, trying to scrape out a meager existence while we glut on obscene amounts of food? While I find the notion of being with your family and being thankful for the things you have a noble one, it is something that should be practiced on a daily basis, not once a year out of some trumped-up sense of obligation.

Like the good Governor, I decided to ask a guest writer to share some of his thoughts on the Thanksgiving tradition. So, without further ado, I give you Jacob Black of the Quileutes.

OMG! He's so HOT.

To Whom It May Concern:

Thanksgiving is an example of cognitive dissonance. Everyone says it's a time to be with their families, that it's a celebration of the harvest, to be thankful, but we ALL know the real story. We all read the same history books; we know what the abundance experienced by the "pilgrims" cost my ancestors. To be perfectly honest I can't understand why anybody would want to celebrate the success of a bunch of bloodthirsty predators. What's so intriguing about them? They got where they are by devouring the innocent, and even if they don't do it anymore, it doesn't change what they are, what they have the potential to be. Why don't you ever call me, Bells? What were we talking about again?

A-Woooooo,

Jacob Black


Well, that about sums it up for me, too. I guess.